How do you know when you're ready to change?
I mean truly change--I'll never look back type of change.
Sometimes I think the reason I have such a hard time changing is because I'm not ready. I may SAY I'm ready and truly believe it, but why is it that I still fail when I try?
More specifically I'm referring to weight loss. Why is it that I set myself up in every way possible to succeed, but I can never reach my goal? I may do well for months, but inevitably I fail. Was it because I wasn't ready to begin with? Was it because I wasn't in the right mindset?
Was it because that's not what I need to be focusing on at that time in my life?
I met a woman online the other day on an online forum who, after the horrible breakup with her boyfriend, decided to change her life. She went on to lose 120 pounds in 4 months. I'm not advocating that type of weight loss in any way, but does it take something drastic like that for most people to change? I have my reasons for wanting to change, but are they not deep enough?
I want to change so badly. I hate the way my life has become. I'm not happy like I used to be and the very thought of changing everything about myself makes me ill because my track record of success has been null.
I went through a horrible experience in September involving a friend. I vowed after that trauma to change the way I live. Instead of that, I went into a deep depression I can't seem to get myself out of.
I look forward every day to changing the way I am, but the execution just isn't there. What's wrong with my process?
4 comments:
This sounds really trite but I have the feeling that it's rather true because there is a gospel principle as it's base--and that is that you have to love yourself. You can't hate yourself and be successful. Heavenly Father loves you tremendously, as does His Son, and if you hate the very person they love so so so much, you're going to have a very hard time. Step back and try to see that you, a child of God, one who is heir to everything He has to offer you, are a marvelous creation! Faults and flaws included!
You see, I'm struggling with this very thing, too. I don't lose baby weight while I'm nursing, and since I nurse for a very long time, I carry extra pounds around for a very long time. I found out after Julie that no matter how hard I work out, no matter how carefully I eat, my body holds on to the weight. I've added a couple of babies and a lot more pounds since then, and I'm so discouraged. I feel so ugly all the time. But when I'm feeling the worst, I'm most likely to choose chocolate for a treat; when I can make myself see that God made me and loves me and thinks I'm marvelous, then I'm most likely to choose an apple for a treat.
I treat myself better when I like myself better.
And we all fail--the trick is to not let the failures define us and to get going again.
You're a delight--own it.
I like what Anaise said.
I've noticed with Steve's and my recent weightloss that when I didn't feel like I was losing weight, I ate worse. If I felt thinnier, like when putting on clothes, then I was really pumped up and it had a snowball effect on my weightloss. I'm working on continuing on my "diet" after I've failed to lose weight for a week. It's harder, but I can do it.
I like what Anaise said.
I've noticed with Steve's and my recent weightloss that when I didn't feel like I was losing weight, I ate worse. If I felt thinnier, like when putting on clothes, then I was really pumped up and it had a snowball effect on my weightloss. I'm working on continuing on my "diet" after I've failed to lose weight for a week. It's harder, but I can do it.
This is the question asked by alcoholics and druggies after they have been clean for a while and then fall off the wagon... Have they failed to change? No.
Here's the REAL truth about REAL change: It is a slow process and a lifelong effort.
And here's the REAL truth about your desire to change: You ARE ready, and, in fact, have already changed tremendously! You are not anywhere near the same person you were last September--much smarter. And much closer to understanding what true happiness is (it may not be being skinny; I know lots of people who got skinny but are still unhappy...).
Depression is self-limiting. You will come out of it. That's not to say you won't fall into it again; we all do.
If, today, you can convince yourself that there is some one thing good you can do for SOMEBODY SOMEWHERE--anybody, and anywhere--then do it and count it as a good day. Do the same thing tomorrow. That's all it takes to call life good. Amen.
Post a Comment